Friday, July 24, 2009

In Depth Bio: Larry Ingleberry

Larry Ingleberry rolled down the hill his village was perched atop at the tender age of two into a neighboring village.  His stroller was quickly confused for a dumpster and trash piled up on the baby for years until a WIZARD came along and adopted this intrepid baby who had by this time blossomed into a beast of a man; feasting on trash and occasional plastic bag filtered rain water.  

The WIZARD, forcing him into work to help offset the costs of his belated Alchemy research, grew to hate the man-child with vehement fervor.  Communication grew to a standstill and the WIZARD thenceforth began hiding Ingleberry’s face filter, used at the Asbestos Manufacturing Company where he worked in the developmental division, quality testing scented Asbestos.  

To Larry’s benefit he contracted and was recently diagnosed with Mesothelioma and has been collecting worker’s compensation checks every two weeks that pay all bills incurred by all inhabitants and pays the rent on the apartment.  It totals roughly 559 dollars every month.  He still lives (with the others) in the studio apartment that the WIZARD first brought him to all those weeks back.             

The moral fiber of the bunch, Larry Ingleberry was raised catholic.  However, Larry constantly invokes random deities at the slightest slip in his children’s misbehavior.  This includes but is not limited to: not cleaning the Hibachi grill adequately enough, and eating only half a string cheese then putting the rest back because it was the last one and you don’t want to be responsible for going out to get another pack and you think someone will just come up and not be able to contain themselves and eat that last half and then it’s their problem.

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